Real Kato Blog: Laziness

... and yet another obligatory poop reference.

Tonight Anna stood me up for dinner, and as penance, she told me I could write about it on my blog. So that's what I'm doing.

Anna, if you're reading this, I REALLY DO forgive you, because you're my best friend and I love you and that's what we do. But because of this, I had to make burgers at home. It would have been fine if I actually had any condiments. I have blue cheese dressing. That's all. It wasn't quite like before.

I guess I could have gone to the store to pick up some things, but I was more lazy than hungry. I get that feeling a lot, actually, especially on weekends. Sometimes I'll just skip a meal, if my only other options require more than sixty seconds of effort. (That reminds me of a stand-up comedy bit I saw many years ago. "My dad is really impatient. He hates to wait for anything. He'll stand in front of the microwave and say, 'COME ON, I don't have all MINUTE.'" I think it was Cathy Ladman who did that bit. Anyone remember her? She was a regular on "Dr. Katz".)

After work today, I again had plans to go to Alive After Five, but again, the weather interfered. So, no flirting tonight. There's been a real dearth of good flirting opportunities lately. There was one girl that smiled at me as I was walking to lunch today, but that was all. Where is everyone hiding? I guess it doesn't help that I work near the university, and school is out for summer.

Speaking of laziness, and speaking of the place I work... I work on the third floor of my building. There are some days when I take the elevator instead of the stairs. While that might be a little bit lazy, it's nowhere near as lazy as those bums who take the elevator to the second floor. I'm thinking, HOW ON EARTH DO YOU FUNCTION IN LIFE, if taking one flight of stairs is too much for you? Actually, the real reason I take the elevator is because it has mirrors in it, and I like to take the opportunity to preen on my way in. Of course, I avoid the elevator if a stranger is in it. I hate the awkward silence, I can't preen, sometimes there are odd smells, there's nobody who's flirt-worthy, and people always seem to press that damned "2" button.

The fifth floor of our building is currently vacant, and it occurred to me that it would be a great place to go poop. (I mean, in the fifth floor bathroom, of course, not just in the middle of some hallway somewhere.) It would make for a much better Fortress of Solitude. Of course, now, just to rankle me, Tim will probably follow me up to the fifth floor one day and start talking to me while I'm trying to see a man about a horse.

Permalink 3 Comment

Posted by Ken in: life

Comments

Comment #1 from olafandyjon (Guest)
2005 May 20 - 10:09 am : #

Nice call on the elevators. Unless you have something heavy or have kids in tow, you really need to re-evaluate your life if you take the elevator one floor.

Comment #2 from MonoCerdo (Guest)
2005 May 20 - 10:38 am : #

I live and work on floor number nine, and even then I occasionally hear snide remarks (mostly where I live) about always having to wait for people on "the low floors" before they can shoot up to their 43 floor penthouse suite. I mean, I'm perfectly willing to climb a few flights of stairs, and I am not the sort of person to take an elevator for one or two floors, but NINE? If I'm climbing that many flights there's probably a fire involved somewhere.

Comment #3 from Nicholas (Guest)
2005 May 20 - 10:46 am : #

I thought all bachelors had in their fridge was condiments and Bud Lite. Wait, that's the commercials talking.

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