Real Kato Blog: News News News

As always, bringing you the important stuff from around the world.

A woman may have saved her own life because she wasn't watching Oprah. Angelique Fijorillo had gone to her neighbor's place when a large boulder crashed through her apartment, through the spot she'd normally be sitting and watching TV. The obvious lesson here is: IF YOU WATCH OPRAH, YOU WILL BE SMASHED BY ROCKS.

Those of you who know me will know that I generally sympathize with women's issues. But as much as women seem to lurve Oprah, I have to say that she frequently BUGS THE CRAP OUT OF ME. I won't go so far as to call her the embodiment of all that's wrong with this country, but look: people are not "freaky" because they have tattoos and piercings, not all men are insensitive boors, and there's something wrong if you have to buy people cars to get them to like you. I get really tired of the turn-off-your-brain thinking that seems to pervade that show, and daytime talk shows in general (with the exception of "Ellen", which is terribly clever). So: turn off the Oprah, and avoid painful death via large boulders.

Harriet Miers has a blog? Well, if she did, it would be freakin' hilarious.

Does Pakistan have a necrophilia problem? Uhh, maybe. Mortuaries in Pakistan are struggling to recruit women after receiving complaints about male morticians "handling" women's bodies. The city health secretary in Karachi, Naushad Shaikh, says women "don't want to handle dead bodies". Their advertising campaign targeted at women didn't do so well: "Dead Guys: Giving New Meaning to the Word 'Stiff'".

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