Real Kato Blog: Porn

Can't wait to see the Google hits I get for this article.

Amy and I were in a store called Priscilla's yesterday. It's a "lingerie and adult novelty" store; in other words, it's a porn shop. It's not the dark and seedy kind of place you might expect; rather, it's clean, well lit, and staffed by a group of attractive women. You might say it's an upscale porn shop. Though they did have Volumes 1 through 18 of "Ass Cracking Ho Bags". Critics will tell you that compared to Volume 14, Volume 15 does a much better job of character development, and it more thoroughly captures the zeitgeist of the ass cracking ho bag society.

We weren't exactly sure what we wanted to get at this place. Wandering the aisles, we found some interesting things, but nothing that we actually needed. Some things were kind of scary. There is a device called a "butt balloon". You insert it into your bung hole and you use a little pump to inflate it. The picture on the box had a woman crouched over this device as if she were about to sit on it, and she was reaching around behind her for the pump handle. Even that part looked uncomfortable, never mind the actual inflation process.

I can't really imagine why one would need a butt balloon. If you went out to get regular balloons and came home with butt balloons, that would be the worst kids' birthday party EVER.

Interestingly, earlier in the day, Anna had sent me an email looking for a place to get a candy bikini in the U.S., for her bachelorette party. She attached this photo:

Anna's request sent me on a Google hunt that led to all KINDS of not-appropriate-for-work web sites. Whoops. So I had to stop looking before I found a U.S. distributor. But at Priscilla's, I was surprised to see they carried this exact product! So Anna will most likely be prowling around town Saturday evening wearing this. If you like, um, candy, keep your eyes out for her.

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